What is kindness? Kindness is being truthful. When you truly examine your working environment is it truthful? We all start off by saying, “Sure, mostly…”. But when looking deeper and in the quiet light of our own homes, you may find that there isn’t much truth in your workplace.
What would a truthful workplace look like? It’s an environment that values critical thinking and debate. Challenging someone’s ideas is encouraged and is not an insult. It’s a place where the message is more important than the messenger. It’ a place where where people are honest about their feelings.
Most of us, believe we are truthful. Are we really truthful? How many of us say we are having a good day, even when the day is bad? How many of us will express friendliness to someone, but not care at all about that person? Have you ever told a coworker you agree with their foolish idea, just to be kind? How many of us say we are happy when we are sad?
And, you may say those “white lies” are harmless. But are they harmless? Why are so many sales forecasts at businesses wrong despite the intention and the necessity for those forecasts to be accurate? And why are so many of us confused about our careers despite quarterly and annual performance reviews?
We are wrong in our forecasts and confused about our careers for the same reasons. One- we lie to ourselves and others about performance. Two- our managers are trying to be nice.
Kind lies are careless. But they are still accumulative. One adds to another and another. And there may suddenly be a day when you are called upon to tell dark lies, to protect the series of white lies. So, take the time to think deeper and consider how to say the truth.
For business leaders small white lies multiply and cross pollinate from one part of a business to another. Is your customer service team in the habit of enforcing agreements with customers even when those agreements weren’t signed? If there are hidden contracts with customers, why not with employees? Why not for business owners?
So, some basic guidelines:
- Always follow the law, no matter what- every business is a legal entity, without the law it does not exist
- Defend the business reputation- Assume that everyone in the public will know every decision
- Take the long view- people are a long-term investment.
- If someone doesn’t react well to truthfulness, then you don’t want them around
As a leader one of the great impacts you can have on those around you is by demonstrating positive behaviors. And, one of the best things you can do, is speak your mind openly and honestly. When you step up every day, say what you mean and don’t hide your feelings, you are setting a positive example for those around you. Not just in their work, but in their lives. And, by asking many questions, encouraging truthfulness, and calling out those who hide their thoughts, you will build a connected team. You’ll lose some people along the way, but those people will usually be the incompetent(hiding) or the narcissists(the game players).
We all want to be on a competent professional team that cares about their work, cares about their coworkers, and cares about getting it right. By focusing on truthfulness, you can build that team.